The Super 'Grandmom'

The times when being with family was the way of life and "Grandmom" was 'the life' at home are the times my dad was born. Family here means a lot more with 20 people under one roof!

A lot of our dinner-table and tea-time conversations revolve around his Grandmom who my dad can't stop talking about. This article is an excerpt of those conversations and his ramblings about this woman who an epitome of 'self-made' 'self taught' and of course Love !! 

While these days most of us talk a lot about Woman Empowerment, Feminism even when there are opportunities and avenues, she, my dad describes was beyond sheer empowerment in times when women were meant for the kitchen.

Hailing from this well respected Brahmin Clan living in an ancestral palatial home in the temple town of Kumbakonam, all the family went through was bad career decisions by the men, fear of sustanence and a lot more downfalls. The time when 'Kunjani Paati' the nine-yard clad, olden day women rose up to the occassion and turned the life heaven for everyone around her, including his mother and his sister whose marriage lives had turned into unfortunate experiences. Giving her five daughters and granddaughters the best weddings, the grandsons education and of course excellent food for this family of 20 and guests unlimited! My dad still tells me in wonder 

"Is it even possible for a woman to be so selfless, unflappable and shoulder such responsibilities with such limited resources?"

Today when my mom makes mor kali, a south indian delicacy one can see my dad indulge and immediately and describe his Grandmom. 

Even at those times of manual grinders this strong woman used to make batter for dosas all by herself to feed a huge hungry family. When the kids including my dad passed the kitchen, she used to call out to them and proclaim "neengelaam 20 suthu suthina, aaluku 2 dosa!" Meaning - "Grind for 2 mins to earn your 2 extra dosas" and all of them used to religiously help her for it, laughs my dad!

Once, my dad recalls, she developed an ailment, and the strong woman she was, came all alone to Madras for treatment. She called her grandsons to come too, not to help, but for sight seeing! When we cringe to read the papers today, she never left a moment empty and was up to date in news, be it politics or current affairs - a mini 'infopedia'. 

While I have never lived with her or even seen her, my dad describes her so vividly that i feel like she lives along !! He reflects on her thoughts of discipline, empowerment and importance of education, while she saw him proudly graduate. Attributing his career to her push, he says with pride that his 10th grade educated grandmom did everything she could to get him to study to make him in his career. 

Now, as times change, morales and disciplines change and when women are almost treated equally with men,  this one woman is already a benchmark 50 years ago. 

Strong yet Selfless!Brave & Bold!Responsible yet Resilient!Commanding yet Compassionate!Humble yet Proud!

As I reflect on these nostalgic reminisces of my dad, I recognise where he got his respectful attitude to a woman from.  May be that is the quality what my dad looks up to in my mom ! Maybe that's what my dad aspires me to be! An embodiment of love, affection, social consciousness, fortitude, frugality, liberty and a lot more! 

Now.. Today.. Each one of them in her family feel proud to say that they belong to the legacy created by That Woman!! The Mother of all Grandmoms!! 

Cheers